just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
did i just pee glitter
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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