OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize