The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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