I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
