He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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