Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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