Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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