In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
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