I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
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