Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
