It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
