just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize