So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
