4 words: hood of his car
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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