I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
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They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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