We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
