I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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