Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.