So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I could make wine with my vomit
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
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For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
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Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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