nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I enjoy the company of your penis
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
