so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
