He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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