She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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