i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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