She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
