so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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