I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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