He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
