Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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