Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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