STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
