so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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