Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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