I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
