I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Did I show you my penis last night?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
