At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize