Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
