come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
