They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
