Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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