he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
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They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
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Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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