Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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