Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
