i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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