And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
The beer is more important than you right now.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Randomize
