I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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