so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
