I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
