i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize