I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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