he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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